


It's for the Best - Xemnas x Reader

by Punklovergirl68



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: F/M, Feelings of guilt, Xemnas is someone I see putting their plan first over their emotions, mentions of romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-26
Updated: 2017-07-26
Packaged: 2018-12-07 04:56:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11616339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Punklovergirl68/pseuds/Punklovergirl68
Summary: Kingdom Hearts belongs to Tetsuya NomuraYou belong to yourself





	It's for the Best - Xemnas x Reader

These feelings he felt weren't real, he knew they weren't real. How could they be? He had no heart, you were nothing more than a pawn in his grand plan, yet at the same time he couldn't help but adore everything you do. He remembered that day, the day he had found you withering in pain as you cried for help. Sometimes he wondered why he let you join, why he didn't just let you die and pass on. You hadn't been attacked by a heartless, no you had simply been hunted down by another human. 

He remembered when he had stumbled across your pathetic form, how blood and drool seeped down your chin as your eyes were glossed over with tears as you dragged yourself across the woodland ground. Hoping to reach a highway or inhabited area to cry for help. He remembered how you desperately clung to his cloak and begged him to save you, how you didn't want to die. It was the first time he had ever shown some sort of kindness to a stranger. You became loyal to him, just as loyal as Saix was. It didn't take him long to realize that something was wrong with him. 

He had grown quite the liking to your company. Always calling for you instead of Saix and giving you the easiest missions he could think up. He let any trouble you caused slide with a small scowl and a stern 'don't do it again'.  He wasn't the only one to start noticing this sudden change, other members of his Organization had started to notice it as well, causing them to act up more and treat him with less respect. His lips twitched downwards as he sneered at the latest comment directed towards him from that one eye sharp-shooter. 

He had to do something, he had to get rid of these feelings. These awful emotions that were trying to eat away at his nonexistent heart. How could he continue to drill this logic into his pawns heads if he himself is showing such emotions that he claims no longer exist in their bodies? But what could he do? [Your Name] was such a strong and devoted member, you did all you were told and never falter or ever failed to come back without having completed your mission first.  

"Xemnas" the monotone voice of his second in command broke the silver haired male out of his train of thoughts as he turned his attention to the blue haired Nobody that now stood before him. Without a word he nodded his head, waiting for the obedient male to continue with whatever he needed to say. "The members heading off to Castle Oblivion are ready to go, should I go ahead and send them? Or do you wish to make any last minute arrangements?" Saix asked.

"There is one thing I wish to change" Xemnas said, as he leaned back in his chair. "Please bring Number XV here, I wish to speak to her" he said. The blue haired male didn't question nor object to his superiors demands as he disappeared through a wisp of black and purple smoke. Quickly coming back in the same fashion along with a [Hair Color] haired female. "Thank you, Number VII. Please wait outside 'til Number XV comes and informs you of the new changes to our members being sent to Castle Oblivion" the superior said, earning a nod before Saix disappeared. 

"What is it, Xemmy?" [Your Name] asked. You were the only member to ever refuse to change their name the minute they became a Nobody. He didn't know why, but at the time he allowed you to keep your original name. Xemnas felt his frown deepen as his stomach twisted and his chest ached at the ridiculous nickname you had given to him. Looking at you he still has trouble trying to determine exactly why he feels these fake emotions towards you. 

There was nothing special about you. You were just a pawn, yet at the same time he felt like you were everything and he didn't like that. He didn't like these emotions, even if they were fake. They made him feel weak and he felt as if they were a potential danger to his plans. Originally he had been against the idea of you going on the Castle Oblivion mission, seeing how only the potential traitors and those he or even Saix felt could jeopardize his grand plan were to go along with a member who will dispose of the traitors themselves if the Keyblade Warrior doesn't. 

He didn't see you as a threat at first, but the more he noticed that he was starting to become soft. The more he started noticing how his chest would ache and he couldn't help but want to give up everything just to have you by his side, he knew you were more of a endangerment to his scheme then any traitor or any other member ever could be. "Number XV" he started to say before stopping as he saw your eyebrows knit together.

"I thought we discussed this, you can call me [Your Name] when we're alone. Remember? You were pleased at the agreement we had come to" you said, giving a gentle smile as you looked at Xemnas. You felt drawn to him, maybe it was because he showed you mercy and saved you that day when you were on the verge of death. Or maybe it was because he was always kinder to you than anyone else. 

No matter how many times he preached that you Nobodies weren't capable of feelings, you knew he loved you just as much as you loved him. It was a silly thought at first, but now you were confident that it was reality. "Yes" Xemnas said, coughing into his balled up hand as he looked to the side in embarrassment for a minute. "[Your Name], I have something very important to ask of you" he said, watching as you quickly nodded your head. Eager to know what he had to say. 

For a minute the silver haired male hesitated to go through with what he wanted to say. Should he really send you on a mission as dangerous as this one? Shaking his head he gave a stern look as he knew that he had to, its for the sake of his plan. Which was far more important then these silly little emotions that weren't even real. "I wish for you to tag along with the others to Castle Oblivion, if we want the Keyblade Warrior on our side the others will need as much help as they can get" he said. 

It was silent for a minute before you straighten out your back and puffed out your chest as you gave a firm nod. "Yes, sir. I know how this mission is of great importance and I will try my hardest to fulfill it along with the others" you stated in a burst of confidence. 

"Good that is all, you may go report this to Number VII as well as inform him to send you along with the other members over to Castle Oblivion" he said, watching as you gave a firm nod and quickly disappeared. Xemnas leaned back into his seat as his shoulder slumped and a strange feeling of...guilt? Filled his body. He did the right thing...right?

-Time Skip-

"Sir, I have reports from Castle Oblivion" Saix said as he entered the room Xemnas was in. The silver haired man stared up at the heart shaped moon, pleased with the progress it was making with the more hearts it consumed with every passing day. 

"And?" he questioned, waiting for his loyal right hand man to continue.

"It seems that Axel was the only survivor" Saix said, for a minute he thought he saw his superior flinch. But as soon as it happened, in a blink of an eye he was back to his stoic self. Brushing it off as a trick of the mind, he continued on with his report. Xemnas only nodded his head as he stared up at the moon with a far off look. ' _It's for the best_ ' he told himself mentally, over and over while ignoring the agonizing amount of guilt and pain he felt inside his chest. 


End file.
